Kenny’s mother (to Five): Excuse me! Excuse me, it’s my son Kenny’s birthday today, and… Uh… wouldn’t your son be happier playing with kids his own age? Assuming it’s okay with your two dads. (meaning Diego and Klaus)
Number Five: I would rather chew off my own foot.
Kenny’s mother: Let’s go, Kenny.
Diego Hargreeves: If I was going to date a man, you’d be the last man I would date.
Klaus Hargreeves: You’d be lucky to get me.
From The Umbrella Academy – Season 1 Episode 10: ‘The White Violin’ (1×10)