Sheldon Cooper: Statistically, always punting on fourth down makes no sense.

George Cooper Jr.: Statistically, you're a dumb-ass.

Sheldon Cooper: When the Aggies give up the ball on their own fiveyard line, the opposing team has a 92% chance of scoring. When they punt from deep in their own territory, the other team still has a 77% chance of scoring. But since they convert on fourth down 50% of the time, the math says they should never punt again.

Meemaw (to Mary): Okay, you can tell me, who's his real daddy?