Oberyn Martell: The whole way from Dorne all anyone talked about was the monster that had been born to Tywin Lannister. A head twice the size of his body, a tail between his legs, claws, one red eye, the privates of both a girl and a boy.

Tyrion Lannister: That would have made things so much easier.

Oberyn Martell: When we met your sister, she promised she would show you to us. Every day we would ask. Every day she would say, "Soon." Then she and your brother took us to your nursery and... she unveiled the freak. Your head was a bit large. Your arms and legs were a bit small, but no claw. No red eye. No tail between your legs. Just a tiny pink c*ck. We didn't try to hide our disappointment. "That's not a monster," I told Cersei.  "That's just a baby." And she said, "He killed my mother." And she pinched your little c*ck so hard, I thought she might pull it off. Until your brother made her stop. "It doesn't matter," she told us. "Everyone says he will die soon. I hope they are right. He should not have lived this long."