The Big Bang Theory Quotes

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(Raj is introducing Andrea, the director of the planetarium, to Howard...)

Howard Wolowitz: Nice to meet you. I'm Howard Wolowitz. Engineer, husband, father... astronaut.

Andrea: Really? You're an astronaut?

Howard Wolowitz: Well, I don't like to brag.

Rajesh Koothrappali: Hmm, yeah, but somehow, you manage.

Howard Wolowitz: So, he was your best friend growing up?

Tam Nguyen: Yes.

Howard Wolowitz: Were there no other kids in Texas?

Leonard Hofstadter (to Tam): Why did you and Sheldon stop being friends? What did you do?

Rajesh Koothrappali: And don't worry, even though we just met you, we think you're right and he's wrong.

Amy Farrah Fowler: Who's Tam?

Sheldon Cooper: He was my best friend in the whole world growing up.

Amy Farrah Fowler: Really? Why have I never heard you mention him before?

Sheldon Cooper: Oh, of course I have. I'm sure I've mentioned him, like, five times this week.

Amy Farrah Fowler: I don't think you have.

Sheldon Cooper: Tam! Tam! Tam! Tam! Tam! There, it's only Thursday.

Amy Farrah Fowler: I didn't just drink the crazy milk, I bought the crazy cow.

Amy Farrah Fowler: What the hell, Penny?!

Penny Hofstadter: I'm gonna need more than that.

Amy Farrah Fowler: You're not having kids? How could you do this to me?

Penny Hofstadter: How is it any of your business?

Amy Farrah Fowler: Because your kids were supposed to be friends with my kids. Who's gonna be friends with them now?

Penny Hofstadter: They will find other friends.

Amy Farrah Fowler: Oh, sure, 'cause Sheldon's DNA plus my DNA equals a kid who knows how to make friends. Grow up!

Bernadette Rostenkowski-Wolowitz: Man, that is one hot weather girl.

Howard Wolowitz: How come if I say that I get in trouble?

Bernadette Rostenkowski-Wolowitz: You want to say it? You can say it.

Howard Wolowitz: Nice try. You're gonna have to find some other way to not have sex with me tonight. And it's not weather girl, it's weather woman.

Amy's Mother (to Leonard): You are so naive. Blondie here is gonna chew you up and spit you out.

Penny Hofstadter: Well, don't tell him.

Leonard Hofstadter: Raj is on next.

Penny Hofstadter: All right. I can't believe they canceled Vampire Diaries but they'll show this.

Leonard Hofstadter: This is the news.

Penny Hofstadter: And that was a woman torn between two hunky vampires. What is your point?

Howard Wolowitz: That was weird, right?

Leonard Hofstadter: Was it? I-I honestly can't tell anymore.

Mark Hammil: Amy, do you take Sheldon for your lawful wedded husband?

Amy Farrah Fowler: I do.

Mark Hammil: And, Sheldon, same thing.

Sheldon Cooper: I do.

Mark Hammil: Then by the power vested in me by EvenYouCanPerformWeddings.com... I now pronounce you husband and wife. You may kiss the bride.

Sheldon Cooper: Amy... I usually know exactly what to say. But in this moment... I have no words. I guess... I'm overwhelmed by you. In a good way. Not in the elevator in the Haunted Mansion way. Even if I can't tell you now how I feel, I will spend my life showing you how much I love you.

Mark Hammil: We are gathered here today in the sight of family, friends and Almighty God.

Sheldon Cooper: That's too religious.

Mark Hammil: That lady over there made me say it.

Sheldon's Mother: He heard you, and he can't un-hear you.

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