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Young Sheldon Quotes

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Sheldon Cooper (narration): As you can see, my meemaw successfully lured me back into the world by reminding me of my brave Texas ancestors. Their blood ran through my veins. I was a true son of the Lone Star State. Albeit a true son with an incredibly fragile immune system. I woke up the next morning with a temperature of 102 and a head packed full of mucus. However, there was a silver lining.

Mary Cooper (singing):

Soft kitty, warm kitty

Little ball of fur

Happy kitty, sleepy kitty

Purr, purr, purr.
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Mary Cooper: Shelly, if you don't mind me asking, what's your long-term plan here?

Sheldon Cooper: I'm working on the math to turn the garage into a self-sustaining ecosystem.

Mary Cooper: Okay. And what exactly does that mean?

Sheldon Cooper: Well, all I need is sunlight and a few seeds to grow unlimited food which I'll fertilize with my own feces.

Meemaw: This just gets better.

Mary Cooper: If you're not gonna help, please go inside. This is not a show.

Meemaw: Now that's where I disagree.
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Quote from Young Sheldon 1x13 - Sheldon Cooper: Excuse me. Do I look like I'm getting sick to you? Principal's secretary: You look a little pale. Sheldon Cooper: Okay, good, that's normal.
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(Sheldon is leaving a classroom after the teacher sneezes two times)

Ms. MacElroy: Where do you think you're going?

Sheldon Cooper: Away from you.

Ms. MacElroy: Why's that?

Sheldon Cooper: I want to live.

Ms. MacElroy: I'm not sick. Get back in your seat.

Sheldon Cooper: No, thank you.

Ms. MacElroy: You know the rules. You can't leave without a hall pass.

Sheldon Cooper: May I have a hall pass?

Ms. MacElroy: No, you may not. Now get back in your seat.

Sheldon Cooper (narration): Rules are the pillars of society. I love rules. But what benefit are rules to a dead man?

(Sheldon runs away)
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Sheldon Cooper (narration): I've been called a germophobe, but I do find a single sneeze acceptable. It could be caused by dust, allergies... Really, whatever nasal irritant floats your boat. However... during flu season... a second sneeze means a plague is upon the land, and it's every man for himself.
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Quote from Young Sheldon 1x12 - Meemaw: (picks up the mouse as a walkie talkie) Hello? (then puts it to her ear like a phone) Hello?
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Georgie Cooper: What are you doing?

George Cooper Sr.: Separating the whites from the colors.

Georgie Cooper: Whoa, that's racist.

George Cooper Sr.: How did I get a rocket scientist for one son and a rodeo clown for the other?
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George Cooper Sr.: 'Cause if I do, it sets a bad precedent.

Georgie Cooper: What's Nixon got to do with it?

George Cooper Sr.: What?

Georgie Cooper: You said "bad president," like Nixon.
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Mary Cooper (to Sheldon): What on earth do we need a computer for?

Missy Cooper: Yeah, we got you and your big head.
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Sheldon Cooper: Welcome to the church of Mathology. Today I'd like to talk about prime numbers and why they bring us joy.
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Quote from Young Sheldon 1x11 - Sheldon Cooper: I'm starting my own religion. I'm calling it Mathology. It's based on a universal binary system. Pastor Jeff: That's terrific, Sheldon, but this is a Baptist Sunday school. Sheldon Cooper: I know, I'm here to convert everybody. The only sin in Mathology is being stupid.
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Sheldon Cooper: Would you be angry with me if I don't pick your religion?

Mary Cooper: I could never be angry with you. You be a seeker of your own truth.

Sheldon Cooper: Thanks, Mom.

Mary Cooper (to herself): And if the truth turns out to be Satan, I will do battle with him.
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Sheldon Cooper: What about Jesus? He was Jewish.

Ira: Oh, we've got a lot of celebrities. Uh, we've got, uh, we got William Shatner, and Leonard Nimoy...

Sheldon Cooper: Kirk and Spock? I want to be Jewish.
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Mary Cooper: I'm so happy you're taking an interest in religion.

Sheldon Cooper: I am. And I've decided to explore other religions, too.

Mary Cooper: What's this, now?

Sheldon Cooper: Pastor Jeff encouraged me to approach religion scientifically, so it only makes sense to enlarge my database.

Mary Cooper: No, your database is Baptist. That's all the data you need. Baptist data.

George Cooper Sr.: What other religions you considering?

Sheldon Cooper: Buddhist, Jewish, Hindu, Catholic, all of them.

Mary Cooper: Nope. Nope. That's not happening.

Sheldon Cooper: Well, why? As an American, don't I have freedom of religion?

Meemaw (to Mary): Those dungeons and dragons are looking pretty good right now, aren't they?

Sheldon Cooper: I'm also looking into voodoo.
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Quote from Young Sheldon 1x10 - Sheldon Cooper (narration): Sleep didn't come easy that night, knowing that, at any moment, I could be decapitated. (he's looking at the ceiling fan) And as if that wasn't bad enough, the bed in my room had a dust ruffle, which, to my young mind, only meant one thing: there was dust.
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