Phoebe Buffay: You have a third nipple?
Ross Geller: Whip it out. Whip it out.
Phoebe Buffay: Yeah, yeah.
Chandler Bing: No, come on. There's nothing to see. It's just a tiny bump. It's totally useless.
Rachel Green: Oh, as opposed to your other multifunctional nipples?
Phoebe Buffay: Ross, could you just open your mind, like, this much? Okay? Wasn't there a time when the brightest minds in the world believe the Earth was flat? And up till 50 years ago, you all thought the atom was the smallest thing... until you split it open and this whole mess of crap came out. Now, are you telling me that you are so unbelievably arrogant that you can't admit that there's a teeny, tiny possibility that you could be wrong about this?
Ross Geller: There might be... a teeny... tiny... possibility.
Phoebe Buffay: I can't believe you caved.
Ross Geller: What?
Phoebe Buffay: You just abandoned your whole belief system! Before, I didn't agree with you, but at least I respected you.
Ross Geller: But...
Phoebe Buffay: How are you gonna go into work tomorrow? How are you going to face the other science guys? How are you going to face yourself? Oh...
(Ross is shocked and leaves...)
Phoebe Buffay: That was fun.
Ross Geller: Will you guys grow up? This is the most natural, beautiful thing in the world.
Joey Tribbiani: Yeah, we know. But there's a baby sucking on it.
Joey Tribbiani: That's how they do pants! First they go up one side, they move it over. Then they go up the other side, move it back, then they do the rear. What? Ross, tell him. Isn't that how a tailor measures pants?
Ross Geller: Yes, yes, it is. In prison! What's the matter with you?
Joey Tribbiani: What? That's not? Oh, my God.
(After Phoebe gives Monica the wrong haircut...)
Ross Geller: How's the hair?
Phoebe Buffay: I'm not gonna lie to you, Ross. It doesn't look good. I put a clip on one side, which seems to have stopped the curling.
Joey Tribbiani: Can we see her?
Phoebe Buffay: Your hair looks too good. It would upset her. Ross, why don't you come on in.
Rachel Green: Is he just the sweetest thing? You must just wanna kiss him all over.
Ross Geller: That would be nice.
Chandler Bing: Pff.
Rachel Green: Pardon?
Chandler Bing: Nothing. Just a little extra air in my mouth. Pff.
Ross Geller: Ben... I want you to know that there may be some times when... I may not be around like this. But I'll still always come back... Iike this. And sometimes, I may be away longer... Iike this. But I'll still always come back... like this.
Ross Geller: When we talked, she said she'd already passed the mucous plug.
Joey Tribbiani: Do we have to know about that?
Monica Geller: What'll you do when you have a baby?
Joey Tribbiani: I'm gonna be in the waiting room, handing out cigars.
Chandler Bing: Joey's made arrangements to have his baby in a movie from the '50s.
(Rachel shares that she had a dream about her and Chandler having sex)
Ross Geller: I can't believe you two had sex in her dream.
Chandler Bing: Sorry, it was a one-time thing. I was very drunk, and it was someone else's subconscious.
(Ross is looking for a Zoo that could take Marcel...)
Ross Geller: We didn't get into Scranton. That was, like, our safety zoo. They take, like, dogs and cows.