50+ Best 'Monica Geller' Quotes | Scattered Quotes

Monica Geller Quotes

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Monica Geller: I split my money and I bought some shares of CHP and ZXY.

Joey Tribbiani: How come those?

Monica Geller: Well, CHP because I used to have a crush on Erik Estrada. And ZXY because I think it sounds "zexy."

Rachel Green: Ahem, what happened to MEG?

Monica Geller: MEG was good for me, but I dumped her. My motto is, "Get out before they go down."

Joey Tribbiani: That is so not my motto.

Monica Geller: Um, I appreciate this, but you don't have to hang out with them for me. They have each other.

Richard Burke: Oh, no, honey. I mean, don't worry. I like hanging out with those guys. They're different than my other friends. They don't start sentences with "You know who just died shoveling snow?"

Monica Geller: All right, that's great. Then just go. Go Knicks!

Richard Burke: Uh, it's the college playoffs.

Monica Geller: Oh. Then, go Vassar!

Richard Burke: Uh, they're not in it.

Monica Geller: Okay, then just go.

(Rachel and Monica both run into bathroom to get a protection, but find out there is only one left, they play rock paper scissors for it and Rachel wins...)

Richard Burke: Shall we?

Monica Geller: It's not gonna happen. They're doing it tonight. We can do it tomorrow.

Richard Burke: Uh, in the future, if I could see the schedule beforehand...

Monica Geller (about Chandler): I can't believe he has a new roommate. Who is this guy?

Ross Geller: Uh, Eddie something. He just met him.

Rachel Green: It'll never last. He's just a rebound roommate.

(The group watches old home videos...)

Joey Tribbiani: Some girl ate Monica!

Monica Geller: Shut up! The camera adds ten pounds.

Chandler Bing: So how many cameras are actually on you?

Ross Geller: Okay, here you go. Pay me back whenever you like.

Monica Geller: You have dinosaur checks?

Ross Geller: Yeah. You get your money and you learn something. What's wrong with that?

Monica Geller: Nothing. Nothing. Hey, you're a cheap-a-saurus! I'm kidding, I'm kidding. Thank you, I'm very grateful.

Ross Geller: Anyone hear from Phoebe yet?

Rachel Green: No, nothing.

Monica Geller: I hope she's okay.

Joey Tribbiani: Yeah, I know exactly what she's going through.

Monica Geller: How do you know what she's going through?

Joey Tribbiani: She told us.

(Chandler is doing sit-ups...)

Monica Geller: Five more and I'll flash you.

Chandler Bing: One... two... two and a half. Ok, just show me one of them.

Monica Geller: Wanna work out? I can remake you.

Chandler Bing: Uh, I would, but that might get in the way of my lying-around time.

Monica Geller: Hey, Pheebs. You know what I'm thinking?

Phoebe Buffay: Oh, okay. How... it's been so long since you've had sex... you're wondering if they've changed it?

Monica Geller: No. Although now that's what I'm thinking.

Monica Geller: His flight doesn't leave for 45 more minutes.

Chandler Bing: What about the time difference?

Monica Geller: From here to the airport?

(Ross's gift for Rachel is expensive antique pin)

Phoebe Buffay: It's so pretty! This must've cost him a fortune.

Monica Geller: I can't believe he did this.

Chandler Bing: Remember back in college when he fell in love with Carol... and bought her that riddiculously expensive crystal duck?

Rachel Green: What did you just say?

Chandler Bing: Crystal duck.

Rachel Green: No, no, no. The "love" part? Oh, my God!

Chandler Bing: Oh, no, no, no.

Joey Tribbiani: That's good. Just keep rubbing your head. That'll turn back time.

Joey Tribbiani: According to the rules... I can't conduct personal experiments, if you know what I mean.

Monica Geller: Joey, we always know what you mean.

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