60+ Best 'Joey Tribbiani' Quotes from Friends (TV Series) | Page 3 of 5

Chandler Bing (on the phone with his boss): Hey, Mr. Costilick. How's life on the 15th floor? Yeah, I miss you too. It's a lot less satisfying to steal pens from your own home. That's very generous. But this isn't about the money. I need something more than a job. I need something I really care ab... That's on top of the year-end bonus?

Ross and Joey: Dream! Your dream!

Chandler Bing: Look, Al, I'm not playing hardball here, okay? This is not a negotiation. This is a rejection! Stop saying numbers! I'm telling you, you've got the wrong guy! You've got the wrong guy! I'll see you Monday!

Chandler Bing: How can I dump this woman on Valentine's Day?

Joey Tribbiani: I don't know. You dumped her on New Year's.

Chandler Bing: In my next life, I'm coming back as a toilet brush.

Joey Tribbiani: We might be leaving now.

Chandler Bing: Tell me it's you and me "we."

Joey Tribbiani: She wants to slather my body with stuff and then lick it off. I'm not even sure what slathering is! But I definitely want to be a part of it!

Joey Tribbiani: It's just... you know, they're parents. After a certain point, you gotta let go. Even if you know better... You gotta let them make their own mistakes.

Rachel Green: And think, in a couple of years, we'll turn into them.

Chandler Bing: Oh, please. If I turn into my parents, I'll be an alcoholic blond chasing after twenty-year-old boys... or I'll end up like my mom!

Gloria Tribbiani: Why'd you fill your father's head with garbage... about making things right? Things were fine this way! For God's sake, Joey! Really.

Joey Tribbiani: Hold on. You knew?

Gloria Tribbiani: Of course I knew. What do you think? Your father is no James Bond. You should've heard his stories. "I'm sleeping over at my accountant's." What is that? Please!

Joey Tribbiani: So then, how could you?

Gloria Tribbiani: Do you remember how your father used to be? Always yelling. Nothing made him happy. Not that wood shop, not those stupid little ships in the bottle. Now he's happy. I mean, it's nice. He has a hobby.

Joey Tribbiani: Break up with Ronni.

Joey Tribbiani Sr.: I can't!

Joey Tribbiani: Then come clean with Ma! This is not right!

Joey Tribbiani Sr.: But, this is...

Joey Tribbiani: I don't wanna hear it! Now go to my room!

Joey Tribbiani: If you go to a hotel, you'll be doing stuff. I want you here so I can keep an eye on you.

Joey Tribbiani Sr.: You're gonna keep an eye on us?

Joey Tribbiani: Right. As long as you are under my roof... you're gonna live by my rules. That means no sleeping with your girlfriend.

Ross Geller: It's the most beautiful table I've ever seen.

Chandler Bing: I know.

Monica Geller: So how does this work? You're gonna balance plates on these little guys' heads?

Joey Tribbiani: Who cares? We'll eat at the sink.

Joey Tribbiani: Here, how about that one?

Chandler Bing: That's patio furniture.

Joey Tribbiani: So what? Like people will come in and think, "Oh oh, I'm outside again."

Joey Tribbiani: Hey, Chandler. That table place closes at 7. Come on.

Chandler Bing: Fine.

(They start to walk towards the door...)

Monica Geller: Phoebe? What is it?

Phoebe Buffay: All right. You know Paolo?

Ross Geller: I'm familiar with his work. Yes.

Phoebe Buffay: He made a move on me.

Joey Tribbiani: The store will be open tomorrow. (they come and sit down again)

Monica Geller: I'm just excited about being an aunt.

Joey Tribbiani: Or an uncle.

Joey Tribbiani: How about if we split it?

Chandler Bing: What do you mean, buy it together?

Joey Tribbiani: Yeah.

Chandler Bing: Do you think we're ready for that?

Joey Tribbiani: Why not?

Chandler Bing: It's a pretty big commitment.

Joey Tribbiani: Ross, did you really read all these baby books?

Ross Geller: Yep. You could plunk me down in any woman's uterus, no compass... and I could find my way out of there like that!

Joey Tribbiani Quotes

Latest quotes added:

Navigation

Info

Scattered Quotes