50+ Best 'Chandler Bing' Quotes | Scattered Quotes

Chandler Bing Quotes

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Joey Tribbiani: It was amazing, and not just for her. For me too! It's like, all of a sudden I'm blind... but all my other senses are heightened. It's like I was able to appreciate it... on another level.

Chandler Bing: I didn't know you had another level.

Joey Tribbiani: I know. Neither did I!

Joey Tribbiani: Last night I couldn't do the thing that usually makes me great. So I had to do all this other stuff. And the response I got! Man, oh, man! It was like a ticker-tape parade!

Chandler Bing: I know. My room's very, very close to the parade route.

Monica Geller: His flight doesn't leave for 45 more minutes.

Chandler Bing: What about the time difference?

Monica Geller: From here to the airport?

(Ross's gift for Rachel is expensive antique pin)

Phoebe Buffay: It's so pretty! This must've cost him a fortune.

Monica Geller: I can't believe he did this.

Chandler Bing: Remember back in college when he fell in love with Carol... and bought her that riddiculously expensive crystal duck?

Rachel Green: What did you just say?

Chandler Bing: Crystal duck.

Rachel Green: No, no, no. The "love" part? Oh, my God!

Chandler Bing: Oh, no, no, no.

Joey Tribbiani: That's good. Just keep rubbing your head. That'll turn back time.

Rachel Green: Is he just the sweetest thing? You must just wanna kiss him all over.

Ross Geller: That would be nice.

Chandler Bing: Pff.

Rachel Green: Pardon?

Chandler Bing: Nothing. Just a little extra air in my mouth. Pff.

Rachel Green: I can't believe one of us actually has one of these.

Chandler Bing: I know. I still am one of these.

Monica Geller: Let's get some coffee.

Chandler Bing: Okay, because we never do that.


Ross Geller: When we talked, she said she'd already passed the mucous plug.

Joey Tribbiani: Do we have to know about that?

Monica Geller: What'll you do when you have a baby?

Joey Tribbiani: I'm gonna be in the waiting room, handing out cigars.

Chandler Bing: Joey's made arrangements to have his baby in a movie from the '50s.

(Rachel shares that she had a dream about her and Chandler having sex)

Ross Geller: I can't believe you two had sex in her dream.

Chandler Bing: Sorry, it was a one-time thing. I was very drunk, and it was someone else's subconscious.

Joey Tribbiani: You know, there already is a Joseph Stalin.

Chandler Bing: You're kidding.

Joey Tribbiani: Apparently, he was this Russian dictator who slaughtered all these people. You'd think you would've known that.

Chandler Bing: You'd think I would've. Hey, how about Joey Heatherton?

Joey Tribbiani: Come on, I told you I don't wanna go back to Joey. Phoebe. What do you think a good stage name for me would be?

Phoebe Buffay: Flame Boy.

Joey Tribbiani: My agent wants a more neutral name.

Chandler Bing: Joey Switzerland?

Joey Tribbiani: Plus, I think it should be Joe. Joey makes me sound like I'm this big: Which I'm not.

Chandler Bing: Joe, Joe, Joe... Stalin?

Joey Tribbiani: Stalin. Stalin... Do I know that name? That sounds familiar.

Chandler Bing: Well, it does not ring a bell with me.

Joey Tribbiani: Joe Stalin. You know, that's pretty good.

Chandler Bing: You might wanna try Joseph.

Joey Tribbiani: Joseph Stalin. I think you'd remember that.

Chandler Bing: Oh yes. Bye Bye Birdie, starring Joseph Stalin. Joseph Stalin is the Fiddler on the Roof.


Ross Geller: Stop humping. Now, Marcel, come... Come here, Marcel.

Rachel Green: Oh, no. Not in my room. I'll get him.

Monica Geller: You've got to do something about the humping.

Ross Geller: What? It's just a phase.

Chandler Bing: Well, that's what we said about Joey.


Character from Friends

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