60+ Best 'Ross Geller' Quotes from Friends (TV Series)

Quote from Friends 2x24 | Ross Geller: All right. I've been feeling incredibly guilty because I wanna be a good friend. And damn it, I am a good friend. So shut up and close your eyes. (kisses Joey) Joey Tribbiani: Wow. You are a good friend. The audition was this morning, and I didn't get it. But that was a hell of a kiss. Rachel is a very lucky girl.

Quote from Friends 2x23 | Rachel Green: Hey, sailor. Ross Geller: Is this what you had in mind? Rachel Green: Ha, ha. I'll say. (Ross picks up Rachel to carry her) Ross Geller: I'm shipping out tomorrow. Rachel Green: Well, then, uh... we better make this night count. Oh, wait, I forgot to turn off the cappuccino machine. Anchors aweigh. Oh, wait. My purse, my purse, my purse. Oh, you know what? I forgot to turn off the bathroom light. Ross Geller: All right, why don't I just meet you upstairs? (drops her) Rachel Green: Honey!

Rachel Green: Oh, thank you for my beautiful earrings. They're perfect.

Ross Geller: Aw.

Rachel Green: I love you.

Ross Geller: Oh. Now, you can exchange them if you want, okay?

Rachel Green: Hmm. Now I love you even more.

Ross Geller (to Ben): Can you say "dada"?

Rachel Green: Aw.

Ross Geller: I'm telling your mommies you said it anyway, so you might as well.

Rachel Green: No luck, huh?

Ross Geller: No. A while ago, I got a "seh" out of him... which I thought might turn into "seh-condary caregiver," but...

(Ross is showing Joey a book Rachel read...)

Joey Tribbiani: What is it?

Ross Geller: I don't know. It's got all this stuff about wind and trees... and there is some sacred pool in it. I don't really get it. But she's pretty upset about it.

Joey Tribbiani: See... This is why I don't date women who read.

Monica Geller (about Chandler): I can't believe he has a new roommate. Who is this guy?

Ross Geller: Uh, Eddie something. He just met him.

Rachel Green: It'll never last. He's just a rebound roommate.

Phoebe Buffay: That's my tattoo.

Rachel Green: That is not a tattoo. That is a nothing.

Phoebe Buffay: For your information, this is exactly what I wanted. This is a tattoo of the Earth as seen from a great, great distance. It's the way my mother sees me from heaven.

Rachel Green: Oh, what a load of crap! That is a dot! Your mother's in heaven going, "Where the hell's my lily, you wuss!" That is not a tattoo! (Ross enters the room) This is a tattoo!

Ross Geller: You got a tattoo?

Rachel Green: Maybe. But just a little one. Phoebe got the whole world!

Richard's friend: Is she really 20?

Richard Burke: I am not telling you guys anything.

Jack Geller: Come on, it's my birthday. Let me live vicariously!

Ross Geller: Dad, you really don't want to do that.

Jack Geller: What's a little midlife crisis between friends?

Richard Burke: Jack... Would you let it go?

Jack Geller: I know what you're going through. When I turned 50, I got the Porsche. You got your own little speedster.

Richard Burke: Seriously, it's not like that.

Jack Geller: Tell you what. Maybe one of these weekends you can borrow the car and I could...

Ross Geller: Dad, I beg you not to finish that sentence!

Rachel Green: I'm good. I won't laugh anymore. Put your hands back there.

Ross Geller: No, see, now I can't, because, uh... I'm feeling too self-conscious.

Rachel Green: Just one cheek.

Ross Geller: No. Ha. The moment's gone.

Rachel Green: Just put your hands out and I'll back up into it.

Ross Geller: That's romantic.

Ross Geller: Okay, here you go. Pay me back whenever you like.

Monica Geller: You have dinosaur checks?

Ross Geller: Yeah. You get your money and you learn something. What's wrong with that?

Monica Geller: Nothing. Nothing. Hey, you're a cheap-a-saurus! I'm kidding, I'm kidding. Thank you, I'm very grateful.

Ross Geller: Anyone hear from Phoebe yet?

Rachel Green: No, nothing.

Monica Geller: I hope she's okay.

Joey Tribbiani: Yeah, I know exactly what she's going through.

Monica Geller: How do you know what she's going through?

Joey Tribbiani: She told us.

Quote from Friends 2x08 | (In the girls' aparment...) Phoebe Buffay: Let's hear about the kiss. Was it like a soft brush against your lips... or was it like a, you know, "I gotta have you now" kind of thing? Rachel Green: Well, at first it was really intense, you know? And then... Oh, God. And then we just sort of sunk into it. Phoebe Buffay: Oh... So, okay, was he holding you? Or were his hands on your back? Rachel Green: No, actually, ahem, first they started out on my waist... and then they slid up and then they were in my hair. Monica Geller: Oh. Phoebe Buffay: Oh. (In the boys' apartment...) Ross Geller: And, uh... And then I kissed her. Joey Tribbiani: Tongue? Ross Geller: Yeah. Joey Tribbiani: Cool.

Quote from Friends 2x07 | Ross Geller: I'm with somebody else. I'm happy. This ship has sailed! Rachel Green: You're just gonna put away feelings or whatever it was you felt for me? Ross Geller: I've been doing it since ninth grade. I've gotten pretty damn good at it. Rachel Green: All right, fine. You go ahead and do that, Ross. I don't need your stupid ship! Ross Geller: Good. (Ross leaves...) Rachel Green: Good! And you know what? Now I got closure! (Rachel locks the door behind him, Rachel is upset, Ross returns and Rachel is trying to unlock the door, but can't...) Ross Geller: Try the bottom one. (She finally unlocks the door and they kiss)

Phoebe Buffay: You have a third nipple?

Ross Geller: Whip it out. Whip it out.

Phoebe Buffay: Yeah, yeah.

Chandler Bing: No, come on. There's nothing to see. It's just a tiny bump. It's totally useless.

Rachel Green: Oh, as opposed to your other multifunctional nipples?

Phoebe Buffay: Ross, could you just open your mind, like, this much? Okay? Wasn't there a time when the brightest minds in the world believe the Earth was flat? And up till 50 years ago, you all thought the atom was the smallest thing... until you split it open and this whole mess of crap came out. Now, are you telling me that you are so unbelievably arrogant that you can't admit that there's a teeny, tiny possibility that you could be wrong about this?

Ross Geller: There might be... a teeny... tiny... possibility.

Phoebe Buffay: I can't believe you caved.

Ross Geller: What?

Phoebe Buffay: You just abandoned your whole belief system! Before, I didn't agree with you, but at least I respected you.

Ross Geller: But...

Phoebe Buffay: How are you gonna go into work tomorrow? How are you going to face the other science guys? How are you going to face yourself? Oh...

(Ross is shocked and leaves...)

Phoebe Buffay: That was fun.

Ross Geller Quotes

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Ross Geller is a character from Friends

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