100+ Best 'Young Sheldon' Quotes | Page 2 of 10 | Scattered Quotes

Young Sheldon Quotes

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(Mary is not talking to George)

Meemaw: What's that about?

Mary Cooper: I'm punishing him.

Meemaw: What for?

Mary Cooper: Nothing, really. But once I got started, I couldn't stop.

Missy Cooper: I actually missed you.

Meemaw: Ain't that nice?

Sheldon Cooper: What about me did you miss?

Missy Cooper: I don't know.

Sheldon Cooper: Well, think about it and get back to me.

Georgie Cooper (to Missy): Ha, he gave you homework.

Nurse (to Sheldon): This is Ricky, your new roommate.

Mary Cooper: Nice to meet you.

(Sheldon give Ricky the death stare)

Nurse (to Ricky): I am so sorry.

Sheldon Cooper: I can't sleep.

Nurse: Did you try counting sheep?

Sheldon Cooper: Oh, no, I'm afraid of farm animals.

Nurse: Of course you are. Well, I don't know what I can do for you.

Sheldon Cooper: Do you know the "Soft Kitty" song?

Nurse: No.

Sheldon Cooper: I'll teach it to you. Get a notepad.

Meemaw: Your brother's gonna be fine, but he has to have his gallbladder removed.

Missy Cooper: How's he gonna pee?

Meemaw: Not that bladder, his gallbladder.

Georgie Cooper: What's the gallbladder do?

Meemaw: I guess not much, if they're takin' it out.

Missy Cooper: You think he'll bring it home so we can see it?

Meemaw: I'll ask.

Mary Cooper: I'm sure you'll feel better in the morning.

Missy Cooper: Hey, Mom, you know how twins can feel each other's pain?

Mary Cooper: You're going to school tomorrow.

Missy Cooper: I think she's gettin' smarter.

Sheldon Cooper (narration): Throughout my high school career, Nurse Nora and I had been through quite a few close calls...

Nurse Nora: This is just a blister.

Sheldon Cooper: Are you sure?

Nurse Nora: Sheldon, I promise you don't have leprosy.

Sheldon Cooper: Ooh, that's bright.

Nurse Nora: Proving you don't have hysterical blindness.

Sheldon Cooper: Well, can you test for just hysterical?

Nurse Nora: Oh. Looks like you bit your cheek.

Sheldon Cooper: How do you know it's not scurvy?

Nurse Nora: Because you're not a pirate. So, we've got a tummyache?

Sheldon Cooper: Yes. I'm afraid it might be cholera.

Nurse Nora: Again?

Sheldon Cooper: I have one of the symptoms.

Nurse Nora: Okay, on a scale of one to ten, what's your pain level?

Sheldon Cooper: Three... point four seven.

Nurse Nora: That's pretty serious. But since you're at a 3.47, I'm gonna give you the strongest medication I'm allowed to give you.

(Gives him anti-tummyache gummy bears)

Sheldon Cooper: You're an angel of mercy, Nurse Nora. Ooh, cherry.

Mary Cooper: He's only doing it 'cause of that Veronica girl.

George Cooper Sr.: Oh, sure. That makes sense.

Mary Cooper: What do you mean, it makes sense?

George Cooper Sr.: When I was his age, I hitchhiked to Florida 'cause I had a friend that had a girlfriend who knew a girl who might be willing.

Meemaw: But then you met my daughter and you didn't have to travel so far. (laughs)

Pastor Jeff: Why don't we take a moment to pray, uh, keeping in mind that our prayers should not be for our own benefit, but for our family, friends, fellow Texans, Americans of all races and religions and the world. Well, most of the world. Y'all know what countries to pick.

Paige: Sheldon, it's just a fun scary story.

Sheldon Cooper: It's nonsense is what it is.

Missy Cooper: Old man.

Sheldon Cooper: I'm not an old man, I'm ten.

Missy Cooper: More like 110.

Paige: You know, I read that adults who had a stunted childhood often become social misfits and weirdos.

Sheldon Cooper: You didn't read that, you're making it up like your goat story.

Paige: Psychology Magazine, February issue, 1988.

Sheldon Cooper: Well, um... That doesn't make it true.

Paige: Guess you'll find out when you're an adult.

Sheldon Cooper: I guess I will.

Sheldon Cooper (narration): Well, we know how this story ends. I grew up to become a well-adjusted and charming fellow. But at that moment in time, she had me worried.

Sheldon Cooper: Are you going to talk the whole time?

Missy Cooper: It seems to be annoying you, so, yeah.

(Little Sheldon finishes his first video game...)

Sheldon Cooper (narration): Since that night, I've battled orcs, zombies, Na*zis, Na*zi-zombies, a dinosaur in a go-kart, and played Van Halen's "Hot for Teacher" on a stringless, plastic guitar. But nothing would ever compare to that first quest with my meemaw. Although Leonard pulling a groin muscle doing Dance Dance Revolution was a close second.

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