Lucifer Quotes

Lucifer Morningstar: There is something rotten inside of me. I find it near impossible to drown out the constant cacophony of voices whispering in my ear, telling me I am evil. I'm drowning, doctor! And I can't stop asking myself... why do I hate myself so much?

Doctor: You have moles that large on your back? You need to get them checked out, have them removed.

Lucifer Morningstar: But I tried removing them in the past, but the stubborn buggers always seem to grow back. I just need you to dress them up a smidge. Maybe you could... attach some white feathers or tattoo them. Something cheery, flowers, maybe.

Doctor: Tattoo your moles? I was thinking maybe I could get you a discount on some botox, but...

Lucifer Morningstar: I don't need botox, doctor! What I need is for you to fix them, because they are disgusting!

Lucifer Morningstar: Oh gosh, no! I'm so sorry. I seem to have picked up the candy dandy rave donuts instead of the regular glazed ones. One bite of this and you'd be riding the rainbow unicorn for days. Come to think of it, I just realized what happened to Monday and Tuesday.

Lucifer Morningstar: Detective. You threw yourself onto me. You were willing to sacrifice yourself to save me.

Lucifer Morningstar: I've gotten to know all of you in my time here, which is what makes this... my final case, so difficult. Dougie in the motor pool, who helped put a siren on my car. Thank you for that. Cucuzza in evidence, who always let me inspect the cocaine seizures first. And you. Nameless uni, I think I'll miss you most of all. So anyway, as a parting gift for everyone... I've hired a Carl's Jr. truck out in the parking lot. Free burgers for you all. Go on! Knock yourselves out.

Eve: Look what came in the mail today. It's a me costume.

Lucifer Morningstar: I can see.

Eve: Does it make you want to come over here and... tempt me?