100+ Best 'Lucifer' Quotes (TV Show): "It's Good to be Bad." | Page 22 of 24

Lucifer's hookup: You're an angel.

Lucifer Morningstar: Oh, gosh. Uh, my apologies. And for the record, I don't usually suffer from premature unfurling. Right. Now, where were we?

Lucifer's hookup: No, keep them out. I'm totally into cosplay. I could dress up as a devil and make it really sexy.

Lucifer Morningstar: I have no desire to have sex with myself. Not right now, at least.

Amenadiel (to Lucifer): Brother, if you can be redeemed, that means that anyone can. Now, isn't that divine?

Amenadiel: Lucifer, I'm not angry with you that you somehow got your wings back, or even that you cut them off again, as foul as that may be. I'm angry with myself. Because somehow I made you feel like you couldn't confide in me.

Lucifer Morningstar: Well, comparing body parts is never good for the male ego, especially between brothers.

Amenadiel: But that's just it, Luci. My ego should never be an issue. I am an angel. A soldier of God. His favorite son.

Lucifer Morningstar: Oh, that's gonna be a thing, isn't it?

Lucifer Morningstar (to Sam): I define who I am, not Him. Me! (Lucifer's wings appear again) Oh, bloody hell. They're back, aren't they? How? How are you doing this? Did my Father give you some kind of totem? A talisman?

Ella Lopez (to Amenadiel): You never know when your rock-bottom pain and humiliation can end up helping others. I mean, God works in mysterious ways. So you just got to believe that when He crushes your nuts, He does it for a reason.

Lucifer Morningstar: Nothing pisses God off more than exercising free will.

Chloe Decker: What are you doing?

Lucifer Morningstar: Consulting.

Chloe Decker: Then consult less.

Lucifer Morningstar: Imagine, buying your own establishment just to justify your decadent lifestyle. It's absurd.

Chloe Decker: Yeah. Absurd.

Ella Lopez (to Amenadiel): I've seen you around, doing your handsome broody thing, but... Anyway, any bro of Lucifer's is a bro of mine. Whoa. Someone works out. Now I know who carries the guns in the family.

Quote from Lucifer 3x01 - Lucifer Morningstar: Didn't you get my text? Amenadiel: What? You mean the string of nonsensical emojis? Fire, sword, doughnut, spaceman, clock, dancing lady, flashlight, thumbs up. How am I supposed to know what that means? Lucifer Morningstar: I ignited the flaming sword, used it to cut a hole in space and time, Mum's light flooded through it, then it closed up behind her. All good!

Marcus Pierce: There was an investigation last year. We interviewed... what was it... 92 of your sexual partners? I think I'll refrain from physical contact if you don't mind. You don't seem reckless. Narcissistic, hedonistic... that I see.

Lucifer Morningstar: Well, thank you very much.

Marcus Pierce: Not a compliment. Your file is as long as my Johnson.

Lucifer Morningstar: Oh. Quick read then?

Marcus Pierce: Hardly.

Lucifer Morningstar: Well, I, for one, don't need a file to ascertain you haven't even had a snog in ages, have you?

Marcus Pierce: Accurate.

Lucifer Morningstar: Ah! Ha-ha! Footprints.

Chloe Decker: Those are mine.

Linda Martin (to Lucifer): I almost died because of your family drama.

Lucifer Morningstar: Hot as hell out here, isn't it? Well, close, anyway.

Lucifer Morningstar: Detective Decker. I'm afraid I don't know her badge number. But I'd say with certainty she's a 34-B, if that helps.

Police officer: Checks out.

Lucifer Morningstar: Well, of course it does... I'm never wrong when it comes to cup size.

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