60+ Best 'Love, Victor' Quotes | Page 4 of 5 | Scattered Quotes

Love, Victor Quotes

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Victor Salazar (about Mia's mom): Why do you tell people that she was an addict?

Mia Brooks: Uh. Because, um. I don't, I don't want to admit that I wasn't enough to make her stay. Lying doesn't hurt as much.

Isabel Salazar (to Pilar): Honey, even though the sign says Victor is number one, I'm just talking about the basketball game. I love all my kids exactly the same.

Adrian Salazar: But if you had to rank us, I'd be on top, right?

Isabel Salazar (whispers): Definitely. Shh.

Felix Weston: Ms. S., do you make a poster for every one of Victor's games?

Isabel Salazar: Uh‐huh.

Felix Weston: "Salazar" is a "Salastar." Wow. You are a pun wizard, and I'm under your spell.

Isabel Salazar: Thank you, Felix. At least someone appreciates my hardcore fandom.

Victor Salazar: Yeah, hardcore is right. Back in Texas during regional semis, she got ejected from the game for excessive dancing.

Isabel Salazar: Since when is dancing not allowed? We don't live in a Footloose world.

Pilar Salazar: Not everyone enjoys watching you twerk like a geriatric Cardi B.

Andrew (to Lake): You are awesome. And one day, there's gonna be a guy who doesn't need to be told how awesome you are. And whoever he is, uh, he's very lucky.

Felix Weston: There's a lot of things you don't know about me, Victor. I sponsor a manatee named Jessica, I'm a meme in Japan, I make my own shampoos. Damn it. I just spoiled your birthday gift.

Victor Salazar: You're in a band?

Felix Weston: No, no, I'm a DJ, which is even better, because a DJ makes music into more music.

Felix Weston (to Victor): I have the ultimate plan to win Lake's heart, and brain, and if I'm lucky, all of her other organs, too.

Victor Salazar (to Mia): I'm basically scared sh*tless of not fitting in here. It's, like how am I supposed to know how to fit in, or who I'm supposed to fit in with, when I have no idea who I am?

Mia Brooks (to Victor): Sometimes it's easier to just plaster on a smile, and let people see what they want, you know?

Isabel Salazar: Adrian told me I have to step up my bedtimes stories, because they're getting a little... basic.

Armando Salazar: Oh, well, uh, I got a scary story for him. It's about a man, about a vasectomy that didn't take. And him and his wife have a third kid they never planned for.

Mia Brooks: Wait, why are you wearing red? You're single.

Lake Meriwether: Because. There's nothing hotter than being unavailable, so, when Andrew sees me wearing this, he'll think I'm dating someone, and want to get with me.

Mia Brooks: But you're not dating anyone.

Lake Meriwether: Sure, I am. His name is Bruno. He's a freshman at Georgia Tech. Here. Look how hot we look together, hmm? (shows her their photo)

Mia Brooks: That is one‐hundred percent your cousin Robert. Wait. Lake, that picture's from your nana's funeral!

Lake Meriwether: Whatever. Nana would have wanted me to find love with Andrew.

Andrew: I would have thought you'd be too busy taking random charity cases on carnival rides.

Mia Brooks: Bye, Andrew.

Andrew: Oh, you know what? There's a freshman with scoliosis. You could take him on the spinning tea cups.

Mia Brooks (to Lake): I can't believe you like him. He's such a jerk.

Lake Meriwether: I know. He's so mean.

Victor Salazar: What's a stoplight party?

Felix Weston: Oh. Everyone wears a color to show their relationship status. If you wear green, it means you're single, ready to mingle. Red means you're in a relationship, and yellow means you're into someone at the party. You guys didn't have this in Texas?

Pilar Salazar: We had church barbecues. If you wear a sundress that's above the knee, it means you go to Hell.

Felix Weston: Hey. Now that you're dating Mia, you think you can put in a good word with Lake? I kind of have a thing for her. I've been writing a period romantic novel about us. The year is 1875, and a young sheriff named Felix has just moved in next to a widowed candle maker named Lake. And...

Victor Salazar: No, no, no. Don't spoil it.

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