30+ Best 'Good Omens' Quotes - "The end is nigh." | Page 2 of 3 | Scattered Quotes

Good Omens Quotes

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Aziraphale: We may have both started off as angels, but you are fallen.

Crowley: I didn't really fall. I just, you know... sauntered vaguely downwards.

Aziraphale (about Crowley): Oh, he's not my friend. We've never met before. We don't know each other.

Aziraphale: I'm not consulted on policy decisions, Crawly.

Crowley: Oh, I've changed it.

Aziraphale: Changed what?

Crowley: My name. "Crawl-y" just wasn't really doing it for me. It's a bit too... squirming-at-your-feet-ish.

Aziraphale: Well, you were a snake. So, what is it now? Mephistopheles? Asmodeus?

Crowley: Crowley.

(The animals are getting loaded on Noah's ark...)

Crowley: Oy! Shem! That unicorn's going to make a run for it. Oh, it's too late. It's too late! Well, you've still got one of them.

Aziraphale: God's not actually going to wipe out all the locals. I mean, Noah, up there, his family, and his sons, their wives, they're all going to be fine.

Crowley: But they're drowning everybody else? Not the kids? You can't kill kids.

Aziraphale: Mm-hmm.

Crowley: Well, that's more the kind of thing you'd expect my lot to do.

Aziraphale: Yes, but when it's done, the Almighty's going to put up a new thing, called a "rain bow", as a promise not to drown everyone again.

Crowley: How kind.

Aziraphale: You can't judge the Almighty, Crawley. God's plans are...

Crowley: Are you going to say "ineffable"?

Aziraphale: Possibly.

Crowley: Are you alright?

Aziraphale: Perfectly, yes. Uh, tip-top. Absolutely tickety-boo.

Crowley: Tickety-boo?

Anathema Device: Listen, my bike, it didn't have gears. I know my bike didn't have gears.

Crowley: Oh, Lord, heal this bike.

Aziraphale: I got carried away.

Aziraphale: You hit someone.

Crowley: I didn't. Someone hit me.

Aziraphale: Music. Why don't I put on a little... music? What's a Velvet Underground?

Crowley: You wouldn't like it.

Aziraphale: Oh. Bebop.

Aziraphale: Watch out for that pedestrian!

Crowley: She's on the street. She knows the risk she's taking.

Aziraphale: Just watch the... Watch the road! Crowley, you can't do 90 miles per hour in Central London.

Crowley: Why not?

Aziraphale: You'll get us killed. Well, inconveniently discorporated.

Border security worker: Purpose of your visit to the United Kingdom?

Anathema Device: Well, I'm commanded by an ancient family prophecy. I'm going to use all the wisdom and witchcraft at my disposal to hunt down the heart of darkness, and then do all that I can to destroy it before it brings about the end of the world.

Border security worker: I'm sorry?

Anathema Device: Vacation.