Funny Quotes

Latest quotes added:

I have great faith in fools; self-confidence my friends call it.

- Edgar Allan Poe

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Quote about Death | I want to die in my sleep like my grandfather... Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car. - Will Shriner

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Quote about Death | I am not afraid of death, I just don't want to be there when it happens. - Woody Allen

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I'm super lazy today. It's like normal lazy but I'm wearing a cape.

- Unknown

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Laziness Quote | I've made it from the bed to the couch. There's no stopping me now. - Unknown

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Laziness Quote | If I won the award for laziness, I would send somebody to pick it up for me. - Unknown

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Laziness Quote | I love my six pack so much, I protect it with a layer of fat. - Unknown

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Laziness Quote | I wonder... Do lazy people go to Heaven? Or do they send someone to pick them up? - Unknown

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Deep down I'm a lazy person in a constantly moving body.

- Eva LaRue

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Laziness Quote | I'm not lazy, I'm on power saving mode. - Unknown

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Laziness Quote | Yesterday I did nothing and today I'm finishing what I did yesterday. - Unknown

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Laziness Quote | My goal this weekend is to move just enough so people don't think I'm dead. - Unknown

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Life Quote | Do not take life too seriously. You will never get out of it alive. - Elbert Hubbard

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Famous Quote | Behind every successful man is a woman, behind her is his wife. - Groucho Marx

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I lost some weight, grew my hair and now every woman in America over 40 wants to date me. It's their daughters I want to convince.

- David Krumholtz

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