What's another word for Thesaurus? - Steven Wright
What's another word for Thesaurus?
- Steven Wright
Laugh and the world laughs with you, snore and you sleep alone. - Anthony Burgess
Laugh and the world laughs with you, snore and you sleep alone.
- Anthony Burgess
My wife and I divided up the important talks we'll have with our daughters. She'll handle puberty, sex, and college. I'll handle zombies. - James Breakwell
My wife and I divided up the important talks we'll have with our daughters. She'll handle puberty, sex, and college. I'll handle zombies.
- James Breakwell
Wife: You're still out of breath? Me: I ran hard. Wife: That was yesterday. Me: Just a few more minutes. - James Breakwell
Wife: You're still out of breath?
Me: I ran hard.
Wife: That was yesterday.
Me: Just a few more minutes.
My 2-year-old is walking around calling her lightsaber a “life saver.” We have a dangerous misunderstanding on our hands. - James Breakwell
My 2-year-old is walking around calling her lightsaber a “life saver.” We have a dangerous misunderstanding on our hands.
Me: Did you have a good day at school? 6-year-old: That's not how school works. - James Breakwell
Me: Did you have a good day at school?
6-year-old: That's not how school works.
Me: Scientists found what makes hair turn gray and fall out. Wife: They discovered children? - James Breakwell
Me: Scientists found what makes hair turn gray and fall out.
Wife: They discovered children?
Me: Who ate my brownie? 2-year-old: A penguin. Me: Are you the penguin? 2: *waddles away* - James Breakwell
Me: Who ate my brownie?
2-year-old: A penguin.
Me: Are you the penguin?
2: *waddles away*
© 2025 Scattered Quotes
Up ↑
