Phoebe Buffay Quotes

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Ross Geller: That's Marcel. Wanna say hi?

Monica Geller: No no, I don't.

Rachel Green: Oh, he's precious! Where'd you get him?

Ross Geller: My friend Bethel rescued him from some lab.

Phoebe Buffay: That is so cruel. Why!? Why would a parent name their child Bethel?

Phoebe Buffay: I'm always the last to know.

Monica Geller: You are not. We tell you stuff.

Phoebe Buffay: I was the last one to know when Chandler got bit by the peacock. I was the last to know you had a crush on Joey, when he was moving in.

Joey Tribbiani: What?

Phoebe Buffay: Oh... Looks like I was second to last.

Phoebe Buffay:

New York City has no power

And the milk is getting sour

But to me it is not scary

'Cause I stay away from dairy

Phoebe Buffay: I wanna start with a song that's about that moment... when you suddenly realize what life is really all about. Okay, here we go. (Electricity goes off...) Okay. Thank you very much.

Phoebe Buffay: I can't believe you tried to move the green ottoman.

Chandler Bing: Thank God, you didn't try to fan out the magazines. She'll scratch your eyes right out.

Monica Geller: You guys, I am not that bad!

Phoebe Buffay: Yeah, you are, Monica. Remember, I lived with you? You were a little... you know...

Monica Geller: That is so unfair!

Ross Geller: Oh, come on! When we were kids, yours was the only Raggedy Ann doll that wasn't raggedy.

Chandler Bing: How do you do that?

Phoebe Buffay: It's like a gift.

Chandler Bing: We should always always break up together.

Phoebe Buffay: I'd like that!

(Rachel got her first paycheck...)

Phoebe Buffay: I remember when I got my first paycheck. There was a cave-in in a mine, and eight people were killed.

Monica Geller: You worked in a mine?

Phoebe Buffay: No, I worked at a Dairy Queen. Why?

(Ross is showing the group video from ultrasound...)

Ross Geller: Well, isn't that amazing?

Joey Tribbiani: What are we supposed to be seeing here?

Chandler Bing: I don't know, but I think it's about to attack the Enterprise.

Phoebe Buffay: You know, if you tilt your head to the left and relax your eyes... it kind of looks like an old potato.

Ross Geller: Then don't do that, all right?

Phoebe Buffay: You guys, do you know anything about chicks?

Chandler Bing: Fowl? No. Women? No.

Chandler Bing: So after you put the suggestion in the box... how long did it take for the roller skating to happen?

Phoebe Buffay: About three months.

Chandler Bing: Okay, so I guess that's about two weeks before the topless thing kicks in.

Ross Geller: So how’d it go? (talking about Monica breaking up with Alan)

Monica Geller: You know.

Phoebe Buffay: Did he mention us?

Monica Geller: He says he’s really gonna miss you guys.

Phoebe Buffay: You know, those stupid soda people gave me $7000 for the thumb.

Ross Geller: Oh, my God.

Chandler Bing: Are you kidding me?

Rachel Green: Seven thousand dollars?

Phoebe Buffay: And on my way over here, I stepped in gum. What is up with the universe?

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