The Best 'Blaire Bennett' Quotes from Ted

Ted: Blaire, be a pal, huh? Just this once.
John Bennett: I’m basically an adult already, OK? I just want to watch an adult movie.
Blaire Bennett: All right, fine.
John Bennett: What?
Ted: What?
Blaire Bennett: I don’t have time to stand here all day and argue. OK, just go wait in the car.
Ted: Holy sh*t. F**king awesome! Wow, Thank you so much! Blaire, this is f**king awesome! Thank you so much!
John Bennett: Oh, my God, Blaire! You’re f**king amazing, Blaire! Thank you so much! Oh, you’re the f**king best!
Ted: Oh, and whatever seems grossest to you, that’s probably what we’re going to like.

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Blaire Bennett: I got plans tonight.
Ted: Oh, yeah? What-what do you got going on?
Blaire Bennett: Just stuff.
Ted: Like college stuff?
Blaire Bennett: Yes.
Ted: Toga party?
Blaire Bennett: No.
Ted: F**king rush week?
Blaire Bennett: No.
Ted: F**king around with the new pledges, but then Diane goes a little too far and something horrible happens but then you all kind of work together to cover it up and then the next day, you just go to class like nothing happened but now you’re all bonded for life by, like, a horrible secret, and it seems like it’s all going to be OK but then Rachel seems a little shaky and you wonder if she’s going to be a problem?
Blaire Bennett: What the f**k are you talking about?
Ted: I’m just making conversation.

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John Bennett: Jurassic Park. It’s, like, the greatest movie I’ve ever f**king seen, like, ever.
Ted: Yeah, Spielberg actually got real dinosaurs.
Blaire Bennett: Uh, yeah, I don’t think so.
Ted: No, he did.
John Bennett: No, he did. He totally did. There’s no other explanation.
Blaire Bennett: I promise you guys he did not get real dinosaurs.
Ted: Well, that’s-that’s a ignorant thing to say, Blaire, when you didn’t see the movie.
John Bennett: Yeah, no, he made “ET” and he made “Jaws” and this was his reward. He got real dinosaurs to play with. It all adds up.

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Matty Bennett: Not all Jewish doctors are smart, Susan. That’s one of those stereotypes.
Blaire Bennett: Wow. Even when you’re technically on the right side, you still find a way to ruin it.
Matty Bennett: What? I just said they’re not all smart. Some of them Hebrews are just in it for the money.
Blaire Bennett: That is beyond f**king offensive.
Matty Bennett: Sorry. Hebrews and Shebrews.

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Blaire Bennett: How can you watch that sh*t? It’s just car chases and blowing stuff up.
John Bennett: Why did you just say two good things as if they’re two bad things?

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Blaire Bennett: Get rid of that weed or so help me God, you are going in the f**king dryer.
Ted: Oh, big deal. I’ve been in dryers.
Blaire Bennett: I’ll put you in a Matty load.
Ted: OK, f**k. I’ll do it. I’ll do it.

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Blaire Bennett (to Matty): See, this is the kind of sh*t that wouldn’t happen if he was in school. (talking about broken TV and prostitutes)
Ted: Wait, what?
Matty Bennett: You’re going to school.
Ted: Wait, hang on. That is a serious overreaction.
Matty Bennett: You’re going to school, and you’re going to grow a f**king brain!
Ted: Oh, come on!
Beef (prostitute): I think brains are sexy.

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Ted: I guard the house when you guys are out.
Blaire Bennett: You do not.
Ted: Yeah, I do.
Blaire Bennett: How? If somebody broke in, what would you do?
Ted: I… I would tell him all the good stuff’s in the backyard and then I’d lock the door behind him.

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Blaire Bennett: You should be going to school every day with John. You’d learn something. And maybe you wouldn’t make all these ignorant comments.
Ted: Uh, yeah, no thanks.
Blaire Bennett: Why not?
Ted: Because. TV.

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Blaire Bennett Quotes

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Blaire Bennett is a character from Ted