100+ Best 'Lucifer' Quotes (TV Show): "It's Good to be Bad." | Page 13 of 24

Dan Espinoza (to Chloe): Are you sleeping with this idiot?

Lucifer Morningstar: She hasn't had the pleasure, unfortunately, no.

Dan Espinoza: What in God's name are you doing here?

Lucifer Morningstar: Nothing in His name. Here on my own, actually.

Lucifer Morningstar (after throwing Joe from the window): Did I squeeze too hard?

Lucifer Morningstar: I’m not gonna hurt you, Justin, I’m going to destroy you.

Mazikeen: Oh, this is so hot. It’s like you’re punishing yourself.

Justin (Lucifer’s imposter): You know who you’re messing with? I’m Lucifer freaking Morningstar!

Lucifer Morningstar: Oh… Are you now?

Lucifer Morningstar: Mm, you checking for a wire or are you just pleased to see me?

Lucifer Morningstar: Do I get a code word? You know, for when you take her down. If so, might I suggest “monkey bottoms”? ‘Cause trust me, I can work that into any sentence quite naturally.

Chloe Decker: Finally, some rain. Maybe someone up there is looking out for us.

Lucifer Morningstar: I can assure you, He’s in no way meteorologically inclined. Apart from the whole Noah thing, and that was a one-off.

Chloe Decker: You step out of line one time…

Lucifer Morningstar: You can give me a right-good spanking, I promise.

Mazikeen: That was the LAPD.

Lucifer Morningstar: Ah, was Detective Decker calling to apologize? Unless it involves lingerie, I don’t accept.

Ty Huntley: Lucifer. Wake up. Something really bad happened.

Lucifer Morningstar: Well, I hope you enjoyed every minute of it.

Lucifer Morningstar (to Ty): I’m fascinated. I mean, do you know how rare you are? A celebrity virgin in Los Angeles, and surrounded by temptation. I mean, you, Ty, are like a four-leaf clover and a unicorn made a baby. Without, uh, having sex, of course.

(Chloe shows Trixie the movie she stared in)

Trixie Espinoza: I’ve seen this before, Mommy.

Chloe Decker: You have? Where?

Trixie Espinoza: I have the Internet.

Chloe Decker: Oh, right.

Trixie Espinoza: This isn’t even in HD.

Chloe Decker: Mm. Hmm. Well, what’d you think?

Trixie Espinoza: I thought it’s hilarious!

Chloe Decker: Was this some staged thing to get a confession out of Josh?

Lucifer Morningstar: That’s probably more plausible to you than my angelic brother slowing time while I pluck a bullet out of thin air, isn’t it?

Amenadiel: You asked me here to tell me that?

Lucifer Morningstar: No, no, no, I thought I’d use you to remedy a situation that I’ve mishandled, and annoy you in the process. Kill two birds with one prayer sort of thing, hmm?

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