Cobra Kai Quotes

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(Daniel has taken Robby to train in the forest...)

Daniel LaRusso: You let me know when you can do all the kicks without falling.

Robby Keene: Where are you going?

Daniel LaRusso (with a phone in his hands): The Devils are playing the Islanders on the East Coast. I'm gonna move to a spot with better service.

Robby Keene: What happened to no distractions?

Daniel LaRusso: Hockey doesn't count!

(Johnny's speech to get Cobra Kai allowed back in the competition)

Johnny Lawrence: Look, I admit Cobra Kai had its share of problems in the '80s. My sensei didn't always play by the rules. That's why I left. But my Cobra Kai is different. It's a place where kids can come and feel like they belong. Where they won't get picked on just because they're a bunch of losers. Er, because they're unique. I've watched firsthand as my students have gotten stronger. Gained confidence. Learned how to stand up for themselves. Cobra Kai is making a difference in these kids' lives. And honestly... They're making a difference in mine as well. Thank you.

Miguel Diaz: I need somewhere romantic, but not too romantic.

Hawk: You could take her to get tattoos.

Miguel Diaz: What?

Hawk: I know a guy, just hooked me up with this bad boy.

Miguel Diaz: Oh, sh*t.

Aisha Robinson: Oh! That is badass.

Hawk: Right? 14 hours in the chair.

Aisha Robinson: Wait, are your parents okay with that?

Hawk: Oh, they have no idea. Definitely going to have to wear a T-shirt until college. Probably longer. Please don't tell them.

Johnny Lawrence: Fear does not exist in this dojo, does it?

Hawk: No, Sensei!

Johnny Lawrence: Pain does not exist in this dojo, does it?

Aisha Robinson: No, Sensei.

Johnny Lawrence: Defeat does not exist in this dojo, does it?

Miguel Diaz: No, Sensei.

Johnny Lawrence: Class, are you ready to learn the way of the fist?

Cobra Kai: Yes, Sensei!

Johnny Lawrence: Sorry, speak up, Lip. Or is your tongue messed-up too? Are you one of those challenged kids?

Eli Moskowitz: Um, the doctor said I could be on the spectrum.

Johnny Lawrence: I don't know what that is, but get off it pronto. All right?

Amanda LaRusso: Ah. Sam said no, huh?

Daniel LaRusso: Yeah, I don't get it. Man, she used to love karate.

Amanda LaRusso: Well, she's not your mini-me anymore. Can't dress her up and teach her tricks.

Daniel LaRusso: Yeah, but what about you?

Amanda LaRusso: Oh, I already know all your tricks.

Daniel LaRusso: Ha.

Amanda LaRusso: And let's try to remember what happened ten years ago when you and I hit the mat for a little karate. (looks at Anthony) Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.

Armand Zarkarian: Reseda? I only have one strip mall in Reseda. On Victory Boulevard.

Daniel LaRusso: Victory...oh, that's right, the one with the, uh, the karate dojo in it, right?

Armand Zarkarian: Uh, yeah, uh, Snake Karate or something. I don't know.

Armand Zarkarian: So, you want me to scratch your balls. How you going to scratch my balls?

Daniel LaRusso: That's not the expression...

Johnny Lawrence (to Carmen about Miguel): Please don't close the door. Look, I know I wasn't there for him when it mattered. I let him down. I guess I let you down too. And I know there's no do-overs, but that kid... is the only person in the world who hasn't given up on me. And I don't want to give up on him. I know I messed up big-time, but if you let him come back... I won't fail him again. I promise.

Miguel Diaz: Okay, are we ready? Let's ask the Dragon Queens to dance.

Demetri Conners: Slow your roll, we got time.

Miguel Diaz: No, no... Sh*t. We just lost one to Doctor Who.

(Guy dressed as a Doctor asks one of the girls to dance.)

(Johnny is looking at his list of students with only Miguel's name on it...)

Johnny Lawrence (to Miguel): Hey, you don't happen to have any friends who wanna learn karate, do you? Oh, what am I saying? You don't have any friends. Sorry.

(Miguel is training in his room, breathing heavily...)

Rosa Diaz (knocking on the door): Miguel?

Miguel Diaz: I'll be right there. Almost finished.

Rosa Diaz (rolling her eyes): Jerking off.

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