Queen Charlotte Quotes

Queen Charlotte: Get started. One of you had better produce the next ruler of the United Kingdom, or your father's line dies with him. Make me a royal baby.

Prince Edward: Mother, you can't really expect us to...

Queen Charlotte: It is not a difficult task. Your father and I made 15 royal babies all by ourselves. I do not see why the whole lot of you cannot make just one.

Queen Charlotte: The only heir to the throne is dead. (Prince starts to sob) Sorrows, sorrows. Prayers. I am stating facts. The princesses have had no babies. The princes have had a record number of babies. Illegitimate wh*re babies. We had one heir, one royal, and she is gone. (Prince sobs again) Sorrows. Prayers. Children, this is a crisis.

Queen Charlotte: And where are your babies? You have made zero heirs to the throne.

Princess Elizabeth: I am trying.

Queen Charlotte: Are you? Really? Dearest, I explained everything to you. I drew you pictures. You are doing it correctly? Making sure he's putting it in the right place?

Prince Edward: My word. There are impressionable ladies present.

Queen Charlotte: Impressionable? Trust me, Edward. No sexual innuendo makes an impression upon your sisters. I wish it did, that they might get ideas to marry and start fornicating.

Princess: Mother!

Queen Charlotte: Perhaps, then, I might have legitimate grandbabies. Instead, virgins to the left of me, wh*res to the right.

Queen Charlotte (to doctor): Have you no sense? It is treasonous to interrupt my beauty sleep. You're lucky my face is a rare jewel. If I could still have people beheaded, you would be in the queue.

Charlotte (to Adolphus): There is reason they wanted me, a stranger. And it cannot be a good reason. I know it cannot be a good reason because you have not looked me in the eye since you told me.

Adolphus: You were chosen. This is a great honor.

Charlotte: Oh, how difficult was it to be chosen? Someone who can make lots of babies. Someone who can read. Someone with all the social graces, with a royal bloodline. That is all they required. It is not an honor. You could've told them to choose someone else. Someone stupid enough to want it.

Adolphus: They did not want someone stupid. They wanted you.

Adolphus: You are upset.

Charlotte: 'Tis a viable option I have considered. Moving. Choosing to be killed by my undergarments.

Adolphus: Charlotte.

Charlotte: We have what? An hour to go? I believe if I'm diligent with my movements, I could most certainly bleed to my death before we reach London.

Adolphus: Like I said, you are upset.

Charlotte (to Adolphus): All the finest corsets are whalebone. You'd know that if you knew anything. If you ever paid attention you would also know that the problem with whalebone is that it is rather delicate and also very, very sharp. And, of course, I'm in the height of fashion, so this corset is quite snug. So I give the appearance of a statue, ridiculous to the eye, but that is because I cannot move. And because I must arrive on display, I am forced into a ludicrous gown so stylish that if I move too much, I might be sliced and stabbed to death by my undergarments. Oh, how joyful it is to be a lady.

Adolphus: You have not moved an inch in six hours.

Charlotte: I am wearing Lyonnais silk, encrusted with Indian sapphires, working with overlay of 200-year-old lace. Apparently too much movement can cause the sapphires to shred the lace. If that were not enough, the gown sits atop a bespoke underpinning made of whalebone.

Adolphus: Whalebone?

Charlotte: Yes. Whalebone, Brother. The bones of whales. Whales died, so I could look like this.