Meemaw Connie Quotes

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Mary Cooper: Shelly, if you don't mind me asking, what's your long-term plan here?

Sheldon Cooper: I'm working on the math to turn the garage into a self-sustaining ecosystem.

Mary Cooper: Okay. And what exactly does that mean?

Sheldon Cooper: Well, all I need is sunlight and a few seeds to grow unlimited food which I'll fertilize with my own feces.

Meemaw: This just gets better.

Mary Cooper: If you're not gonna help, please go inside. This is not a show.

Meemaw: Now that's where I disagree.

Mary Cooper: I'm so happy you're taking an interest in religion.

Sheldon Cooper: I am. And I've decided to explore other religions, too.

Mary Cooper: What's this, now?

Sheldon Cooper: Pastor Jeff encouraged me to approach religion scientifically, so it only makes sense to enlarge my database.

Mary Cooper: No, your database is Baptist. That's all the data you need. Baptist data.

George Cooper Sr.: What other religions you considering?

Sheldon Cooper: Buddhist, Jewish, Hindu, Catholic, all of them.

Mary Cooper: Nope. Nope. That's not happening.

Sheldon Cooper: Well, why? As an American, don't I have freedom of religion?

Meemaw (to Mary): Those dungeons and dragons are looking pretty good right now, aren't they?

Sheldon Cooper: I'm also looking into voodoo.

Meemaw: Maybe y'all are being a little selfish about this.

Mary Cooper: Selfish? We're thinking of him.

Meemaw: Well, that's all well and good, but maybe you should be thinking about the whole world. I mean, what if Einstein's parents had held him back? We wouldn't even have the... Well, I was gonna say atomic bomb, but there's probably a better example.

Sheldon Cooper: Statistically, always punting on fourth down makes no sense.

George Cooper Jr.: Statistically, you're a dumb-ass.

Sheldon Cooper: When the Aggies give up the ball on their own fiveyard line, the opposing team has a 92% chance of scoring. When they punt from deep in their own territory, the other team still has a 77% chance of scoring. But since they convert on fourth down 50% of the time, the math says they should never punt again.

Meemaw (to Mary): Okay, you can tell me, who's his real daddy?

Meemaw: Your Pop-Pop used to have little chest pains all the time.

Sheldon Cooper: Didn't he die of a heart attack?

Meemaw: Well, for insurance purposes, yes.

Meemaw: I want to teach you somethin'. Look at your cards, and then look in the mirror.

Sheldon Cooper: Hey, I'm smiling.

Meemaw: Uh-huh. And what does that tell me about your cards?

Sheldon Cooper: That I like them?

Meemaw: Attaboy. Now... look at my face. Tell me what you see.

Sheldon Cooper: That you're old.

Meemaw: It's a good thing I love you.

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