(Nick is explaining how to make the dumplings...)
Nick Young: You put the baby in bed. You tuck, tuck, tuck. Same on the other side. You give him a kiss good night.
Rachel Chu: That's so cute. And then you eat the baby.
Nick Young: Then you eat the baby after he's cooked.
Rachel Chu: No, you gotta make sure he's cooked. Did your Ah Ma teach you that?
Nick Young: She did.
Oliver T'sien: I, on the other hand, was taught by Grand-Auntie Mabel. You put the Botox in the face, and then you pinch, pinch, pinch. Then, voila!
Colin Khoo (to Nick): Your family aside, have you ever thought about what your relationship with Rachel will be like if you got married? I mean, okay, you're Nicholas Young. You're untouchable. You always have been. But Rachel's not. And if she becomes Mrs. Nicholas Young, every day for her is going to be a struggle. You sure she's ready for that?
Nick Young: When we first met, you had no idea who I was, who my family were. You didn't care!
Rachel Chu: Yeah, I don't care about that stupid stuff.
Nick Young: Well, exactly. You are so different from all of the women that I grew up with. And I love who I am around you. I don't want that to change. And that's selfish, I know. I'm sorry that you had to deal with that on your own. But I'm here now. Whatever happens, we'll get through it together. Dead fish and all. All right?
Rachel Chu: It was so gross. But I buried it.
Nick Young: You dealt with it.
Colin Khoo: All I wanted was a weekend away with my boys. And some beer. Maybe some rugby.
Nick Young: Don't worry. It's gonna be great, whatever happens.
Colin Khoo: Yeah...
Bernard Tai: Let's make some babies!
Colin Khoo: I don't think it will be.
Bernard Tai: Any a**hole can plan a normal stag party. Hookers, drugs, dog-fighting. That's minor league sh*t. To organize a party this massive...
Nick Young (whispers to Colin): Takes a massive a**hole.
Bernard Tai: ...takes a goddamn mastermind.
Eleanor Young: Self-made woman. She must be so proud of you.
Rachel Chu: Well, she knows that I'm passionate about what I do, and she's always wanted that for me.
Eleanor Young: Pursuing one's passion. How American. Well, your mother's very open-minded, not like here, where parents are obsessed with shaping the life of their children.
(Guard appears out of nowhere)
Peik Lin Goh: Hello, sir. How are you? We're here for the party, and we're... We come in peace.
Rachel Chu: Do you know where the Young family house is? Nicholas Young? I'm Rachel Chu. I'm here to go to his family dinner.
Peik Lin Goh: Uh, Rachel Chu for the list. If there is a list. He's on the phone. He's on the phone. Is that a gun knife? It's a knife gun. (another guard appears) Okay, and there's a friend. Hi! Very nice to... We can go through? We're going through? Okay. Don't stab the car. Okay. Okay, okay. Thank you, bye!
Peik Lin Goh: Are you sure you gave me the right address? The GPS says there's, like, nothing here. Like, literally nothing.
Rachel Chu: I don't know why we're here. I mean, I put in the exact address.
Peik Lin Goh: You copied and you pasted it?
Rachel Chu: Yeah.
Peik Lin Goh: Did you just copy and paste "jungle" and just kind of threw it in there?
Peik Lin Goh: Rachel, these people aren't just rich, okay? They're crazy rich. Look. (picks up a handbag with a map of Asia print on it) There's new money all over Asia. We got the Beijing billionaires, the Taiwan tycoons... But the Young family, they're old-money rich. They had money when they left China in the 1800s. And they went all the way down here. Not there... Here. They came to Singapore when there was nothing but jungle and pig farmers. There was a snake here, eating an apple. You know what I mean? And they built all of this. Now, they're the landlords of the most expensive city in the world. Here you go. These people are so posh and snobby, they're snoshy.
Wye Mun Goh: Psst, P.T. Look over here. She's a hottie. This is the kind of girl you should date. Smart, beautiful. Not those like K-Pop skanks with no brain, big eyes and small backsides. She has an amazing backside. This is Goh standard. Don't be shy. Just talk to her.
P.T. Goh (whispers): I love you.