20+ Best 'Zahra Bankston' Quotes from Red, White & Royal Blue

Zahra: Would it make any difference at all if I told you not to see him again?

Alex: No.

Zahra: God f**king dammit. Every time I see you, it takes another year off my life. I'm going downstairs, and you better be dressed and there in five minutes so we can try to save this goddamn campaign. (to Henry): And you, you need to get back to f**king England now, and if anyone sees you leave, I will personally end you. Ask me if I'm afraid of the crown.

Henry: Duly noted.

Zahra (to Alex): We don't have time to deal with this, and your mother has enough to manage without having to process her son's f**king quarter-life NATO sexual crisis, so—I won't tell her. But once the convention is over, you have to.

Alex: Please don't tell Mom.

Zahra: Seriously? You're literally putting your dick in the leader of a foreign state, who is a man, at the biggest political event before the election, in a hotel full of reporters, in a city full of cameras, in a race close enough to f**king hinge on some bullsh*t like this, like a manifestation of my f**king stress dreams, and you're asking me not to tell the president about it?

Zahra (asking about Henry): How long has this been happening?

Alex: Since, um. New Year's.

Zahra: New Year's? This has been going on for seven months? That's why you—Oh my God, I thought you were getting into international relations or something.

Alex: I mean, technically...

Zahra: If you finish that sentence, I'm gonna spend tonight in jail.

(Henry falls out of the closet...)

Henry: Hello.

Zahra (to Alex): I— Do I even want you to explain to me what the f**k is happening here? Literally how is he even here, like, physically or geographically, and why—no, nope. Don't answer that. Don't tell me anything. Oh my God, did I do this? I never thought... when I set it up... oh my God.

Henry: I think, perhaps, if it helps. It was. Er. Rather inevitable. At least for me. So you shouldn't blame yourself.

June (to Zahra): How could you possibly have a boyfriend we don't know about?

Alex: I see you more than I see clean underwear.

Ellen: You're not changing your underwear often enough, sugar.

Alex: I go commando a lot. Is this like a "my Canadian girlfriend" thing? Does he "go to a different school"?

Zahra: You really are determined to get shoved out of an emergency hatch one day, huh? It's long distance. But not like that. No more questions.

(After Zahra notices Alex has hickey...)

Zahra (to Alex): I will chop my own tit off before I let you pull some idiotic stunt to cause your mother, our first female president, to be the first president to lose reelection since H f**king W. Do you understand me? I will lock you in your room for the next year if I have to, and you can take your finals by f**king smoke signal. I will staple your dick to the inside of your leg if that keeps it in your f**king pants.

(Alex is leaving to UK to do damage control for "Cakegate"...)

Alex: Okay. I'll do it. But I won't have any fun.

Zahra: God, I hope not.

(Zahra hands Alex a list labeled "HRH Prince Henry Fact Sheet")

Zahra: You're going to memorize this so if anybody tries to catch you in a lie, you know what to say.

Alex: Does he get one of these for me?

Zahra: Yep. And for the record, making it was one of the most depressing moments of my career.

Zahra (to Alex): Henry's your new best friend. You will smile and nod and not piss off anyone while you and Henry spend the weekend doing charity appearances and talking to the press about how much you love each other's company. If somebody asks about him, I want to hear you gush like he's your f**king prom date.

Zahra (to Alex): You can hate the heir to the throne all you want, write mean poems about him in your diary, but the minute you see a camera, you act like the sun shines out of his dick, and you make it convincing.

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