Prince Henry Quotes

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(After the emails leak, Alex arrives to UK and goes straight to Henry...)

Henry (to Alex): Bit short for a stormtrooper.

(Alex hugs Henry)

Alex: I'm telling you right now, I will physically fight your grandmother myself if I have to, okay? And, like, she's old. I know I can take her.

Henry: I wouldn't be so cocky. She's full of dark surprises.

(From Henry's email to Alex)

Henry (to Alex): I was a careless fool, and I fell in love with you anyway. When you rang me at truly shocking hours of the night, I loved you. When you kissed me in disgusting public toilets and pouted in hotel bars and made me happy in ways in which it had never even occurred to me that a mangled-up, locked-up person like me could be happy, I loved you. And then, inexplicably, you had the absolute audacity to love me back. Can you believe it? Sometimes, even now, I still can't.

(From Henry's email to Alex)

Henry (about first time seeing Alex): You weren't even a president's son yet, but you weren't afraid. You had a yellow ipê-amarelo in your pocket. I thought, this is the most incredible thing I have ever seen, and I had better keep it a safe distance away from me. I thought, if someone like that ever loved me, it would set me on fire.

(From Henry's email to Alex)

Henry (to Alex): I wonder sometimes what is the point of me, or anything. I should have just packed a bag like I said. I could be in your bed, languishing away until I perish, fat and sexually conquered, snuffed out in the spring of my youth. Here lies Prince Henry of Wales. He died as he lived: avoiding plans and sucking c*ck.

(From Henry's email to Alex)

Henry (to Alex): Perhaps I could live in your room like a recluse. You could have food sent up for me, and I'll be lurking in disguise in a shadowy corner when you answer the door. It'll all be very dreadfully Jane Eyre. The Mail will write mad speculations about where I've gone, if I've offed myself or vanished to St. Kilda, but only you and I will know that I'm just sprawled in your bed, reading books and feeding myself profiteroles and making love to you endlessly until we both expire in a haze of chocolate sauce. It's how I'd want to go.

(From Alex's & Henry's emails)

Alex (to Henry): Hey, have I told you lately that you're brave? I still remember what you said to that little girl in the hospital about Luke Skywalker: "He's proof that it doesn't matter where you come from or who your family is." Sweetheart, you're proof too. (By the way, in this relationship, I am absolutely the Han and you are absolutely the Leia. Don't try to argue because you'll be wrong.)

Henry's response: I'll agree with your assessment that you're the Han to my Leia in that you are, without doubt, a scruffy-looking nerf herder who would pilot us into an asteroid field. I happen to like nice men.

Henry: When I was younger, I had this very elaborate idea of taking somebody I loved here and standing inside the chapel, that he'd love it as much as I did, and we'd slow dance right in front of the Blessed Mother. Just a... daft pubescent fantasy.

(Henry takes out his phone and turns on music)

Alex: Aren't you gonna ask if I know how to waltz?

Henry: No waltzing. Never cared for it.

(In a museum...)

Henry: I always thought of the whole thing as the most unforgivable thing about me, but you act like it's one of the best.

Alex: Oh, yeah. The top list of reasons to love you goes brain, then dick, then imminent status as a revolutionary gay icon.

Henry: You are quite literally Queen Victoria's worst nightmare.

Alex: And that's why you love me.

Henry: My God, you're right. All this time, I was just after the bloke who'd most infuriate my homophobic forebears.

Alex: Ah, and we can't forget they were also racist.

Henry: Certainly not. Next time we shall visit some of the George III pieces and see if they burst into flame.

(In a museum...)

Henry: One of the most beautiful pieces we own, and we didn't even steal it. We only needed Villiers and his trolloping ways with the queer monarchs. To me, if there were a registry of national gay landmarks in Britain, Samson would be on it. (Alex takes out a phone and is about to take a photo) What are you doing?

Alex: I'm taking a picture of a national gay landmark. And also a statue.

(Alex suddenly kisses Henry)

Henry: Hello. What was that for?

Alex: I just, like. Really love you.

Alex: Stop, are you kidding me? Prince Consort Road? Oh my God, take a picture of me with the sign.

Henry: Not there yet! Keep moving, you wastrel.

Henry: I'm terrified, and my whole life is completely mad, but trying to give you up this week nearly killed me. And when I woke up this morning and looked at you... there's no trying to get by for me anymore. I don't know if I'll ever be allowed to tell the world, but I... I want to. One day. If there's any legacy for me on this bloody earth, I want it to be true. So I can offer you all of me, in whatever way you'll have me, and I can offer you the chance of a life. If you can wait, I want you to help me try.

Alex: Okay, I'm into making history.

Henry: I've always thought of myself as a problem that deserved to stay hidden. Never quite trusted myself, or what I wanted. Before you, I was all right letting everything happen to me. I honestly have never thought I deserved to choose. But you treat me like I do.

Alex: You do.

Henry: I think I'm actually beginning to believe that. And I don't know how long it would have taken if I didn't have you to believe for me.

Alex: Hi. You seem... less pissy.

Henry: You're one to talk. I wasn't the one who stormed the palace in a fit of pique to call me an "obtuse f**king a$$hole."

Alex: In my defense, you were an obtuse f**king a$$hole.

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