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Jim Halpert Quotes

• • • Character from The Office • • •

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(Dwight is making everyone write down what diseases they have, so he can pick an insurance according to it)

Jim Halpert (to Pam): Wait, what are you writing? Don't write "Ebola" or "mad cow disease". All right? 'Cause I'm suffering from both of them.

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Dwight Schrute: Retaliation. Tit for tit.

Jim Halpert: That is not the expression.

Dwight Schrute: Well, it should be.

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Jim Halpert: If I left, what would I do with... all this useless information in my head? You know? Tonnage price of manila folders? Um, Pam's favorite flavor of yogurt, which is mixed berry.

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Jim Halpert: What are you doing?

Dwight Schrute: Just clearing my desk. I can't concentrate.

Jim Halpert: It's not on your desk.

Dwight Schrute: It's overlapping. It's all spilling over the edge. One word, two syllables: demarcation.

(Jim builds a pencil defense wall around the line where their tables touch)

Dwight Schrute: You can't do that.

Jim Halpert: Why not?

Dwight Schrute: Safety violation. I could fall and pierce... an organ.

Jim Halpert: We'll see.

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Michael Scott: Wassuuuup?

Jim Halpert: Wassuuuup? I still love that after seven years.

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Jim Halpert: My job is to speak to clients, um, on the phone, about... uh, quantities and, uh, type of... copier paper. You know, whether we can supply it to them, whether they can, uh... pay for it. And, um... I'm... I'm boring myself just talking about this.

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