Ella Lopez (high on "candy" speaking to Eve): I know I should be freaking out right now, but your hair is so shiny.
Chloe Decker: I miss him. I mean, he pisses me off all the time. And there are so many things about him that... that I find hard to accept, but I just have to believe I can find a way. Because... I'd rather have him in my life than not.
Ella Lopez: Well, then... I think you know what you need to do.
Ella Lopez: I'm usually not into reality shows either. I prefer more, you know, scripted-content, documentaries, but... I've got a little extra time these days, so... sort of kind of watched, uh, 27 seasons in two weeks.
Ella Lopez: Whenever I'm procrastinating on something, I make an appointment for myself to do it. That way, can't back out. Like, for example, when I had to ask my landlord permission to get Bob, literally put it on my calendar.
Chloe Decker: Wasn't the, uh... the chicken's name Margaret?
Ella Lopez: Bob was my turtle.
Chloe Decker: What happened to Bob?
Ella Lopez: Didn't get along with Margaret.
Dan Espinoza: It's a little unusual for a woman to strangle someone.
Lucifer Morningstar: But look at the size of the bruising, clearly not man hands.
Ella Lopez: I've seen some guys with some pretty tiny lady hands.
Lucifer Morningstar: Dan doesn't count.
Ella Lopez: I think the Devil gets a bad rap.
Lucifer Morningstar: Oh. You do, do you?
Ella Lopez: Sure. I mean, what did he really do that was so bad? What, rebel against his dad? Ask some naked lady if she wanted an apple?
Lucifer Morningstar: Be still my heart. Do go on.
Ella Lopez: I suppose he does run Hell. That's not so great, you know, with the torture and eternal damnation.
Lucifer Morningstar: I'm retired. And besides, I didn't create Hell. I just worked there.
Ella Lopez: And now you're talking in the first person.
Ella Lopez: I miss Charlotte.
Lucifer Morningstar: So do I, Ms. Lopez.
Ella Lopez: I can't believe she's really gone. And that Pierce would do what he did. I know, God works in mysterious ways, and bad things happen for a reason. But this many bad things, I just... I'm having a hard time finding any reason. Why would He do all this?
Lucifer Morningstar: Well, I can't believe I'm saying this, but I don't actually think it's my Father's fault. See, all this time I thought it was Him pulling the strings. I've started to realize that we are the responsible parties. It's quite devious of Him, if you think about it. We've no one to blame but ourselves.
Ella Lopez: Screw that. I blame Pierce. And, Big Guy? You and I are on rocky ground.
Chloe Decker: I couldn't sleep last night, so I stayed up all night working, and, you know, I drank a lot of caffeine. Like, a lot.
Ella Lopez: Was it because of Pierce?
Chloe Decker: No. No. I... I don't think any of this is really about Pierce. I think if I'm honest with myself... all of this is about Lucifer. Lucifer's the... the reason that I said yes to Pierce, and... he's also the reason that I said no.
Mazikeen: Is that a wedding murder board?
Chloe Decker: I am just trying to stay organized here.
Mazikeen: Wow. Mug shot for the caterer. Nice work, Decker.
Ella Lopez: You see what I'm dealing with?
Chloe Decker: Guys, solving crimes makes sense to me. Wedding stuff, not so much.
Dan Espinoza: Ooh, lemon bars. My favorite. Mmm. Oh, man, these are amazing. Who made 'em?
Ella Lopez: Uh, Pierce did. Would you believe that hunk bakes?
Dan Espinoza (spits out the bars): On second thought, who needs the empty calories?
Marcus Pierce: Good morning, Detective Decker.
Chloe Decker: Good morning, Lieutenant Pierce.
Marcus Pierce: Hey. Have you seen the evidence closet?
Chloe Decker: Uh... no. (They go in the closet) Wow. This is a great closet. And, um...
(They start to make out and there is stuff falling on the other side of the wall - in the lab)
Ella Lopez: Oh, yeah. Get some, Decker.
Ella Lopez: They totally boned. (they = Chloe and Pierce)
Lucifer Morningstar: Miss Lopez, please don't be vulgar. The detective doesn't... bone.
Ella Lopez: Seriously, do you not see the epic fireworks? There's more chemistry over there than in my lab. And they just went to the Axara concert. It's a natural aphrodisiac.
Lucifer Morningstar: Well, if you're a pimply millennial, perhaps, but the detective is a grown woman with sophisticated tastes. Trust me, she's not so easily won over.
Ella Lopez: Oh, my God. You are totally freaking out right now.
Lucifer Morningstar: What?
Ella Lopez: About this coming between you and Chloe.
Lucifer Morningstar: Don't be preposterous. I'm not freaking out about anything.
Ella Lopez: It's okay. Okay, I-I get it. You're afraid that they're gonna start spending all their time together. You know, joining each other at crime scenes, bantering over dead bodies. And where does that leave you, right?
Lucifer Morningstar: I assure you, Miss Lopez, that is the least of my worries. The chemistry in there is just a... a flash in the pan.
Ella Lopez: Exactly. A completely hot flash in the pan. Lucifer, what you and Chloe have is on a total other level.
Lucifer Morningstar: Exactly. Nothing is changing.
Ella Lopez: Nope. Nope.