Chuck: The Darkness might, might have a weakness – Light.
Crowley: He tells us now.
Chuck: What? I-I just wanted to trap her. I didn’t want to murder her.
Rowena: Fergus was bright. Walked before his first birthday, but he hated pants. Hated them. He’d run ’round the village, his wee banger just flapping in the breeze.
Chuck: Adam and Eve were the same way.
Rowena and Chuck (at the same time): Kids.
Crowley: I’m so glad the world is ending.
Crowley (about Rowena): She’s using you. It’s what she does. Finds someone with power… cozies up… digs the claws in.
Chuck: Hmm. Yeah, well, I’m not helping anyone right now, obviously. She’s been…nice.
Crowley: For now.
Chuck: Now’s kind of all we got.
Crowley: Whatever. I’m not calling you Dad.
Crowley: Well… that was a complete and utter dog’s breakfast, wasn’t it?
Castiel: I didn’t know dogs had breakfast.
Dean Winchester: Cas is back.
Crowley (to Lucifer): I don’t hold grudges. Besides, that dog collar was a lovely touch, really made my eyes pop. Almost wore it here today.
Crowley (to Dean): You and Sam don’t understand, I’m not your bloody sidekick! We’ve had some good times, so I’m gonna give you one chance. Just one to walk out that door, or I’m gonna take you apart, atom by atom.
Crowley: Dean was a rather scrumptious young altar boy.
Dean Winchester: Really? Father Crowley? Really?
Crowley: I’m sorry ‘agent pathetic has-been rock star,’ did I offend your delicate sensibilities? Where have you been? Your brother and that idiot angel, do you know what they have been doing?
Demon Minion: The Darkness has been released.
Crowley: The Darkness? Please. Myth. It’s a bedtime story, something daddy demons threaten toddler demons with to get them to eat their vegetables. Even if it was true, what’s the concern? Darkness, King of Hell — natural allies.
Demon Minion: It’s just you barely escaped assassination, you’re arguably on the run from the most powerful witch on earth, not to mention an angel of Heaven, and uh…
Crowley: And uh?
Demon Minion: You didn’t call for help until after the orgy?
Crowley (to Rowena): All my life I wondered what I’d done to deserve a mother who refused to show love. I pained over it. I built my bloody kingdom on top of it. And then one day epiphany struck, my mother was incapable of loving anything. And then you showed in my dungeon, we communed and I began to realize you weren’t incapable of love, you were incapable of loving me.
Crowley (about Rowena): A long, long time ago, there once lived an evil bitch – sorry, witch – who was forced to flee her home and her only son because she was, well, horrible.