Amy Farrah Fowler: The last time we were in this room, we were getting married.
Sheldon Cooper: I remember. It's a lot less impressive without Mark Hamill in it.
Amy Farrah Fowler: That's what you said about our honeymoon.
Sheldon Cooper: And I stand by it.
Amy Farrah Fowler: You guys will never believe what just happened.
Rajesh Koothrappali: Yeah, we heard. You did it.
Sheldon Cooper: We did do it.
Amy Farrah Fowler: And we didn't even know we did it!
Howard Wolowitz: Wait, what?
Sheldon Cooper: Two physicists in Chicago had to tell us.
Leonard Hofstadter: Wait, what?
Sheldon Cooper: Their experiment on kaon decay supported our predictions on the higher order corrections pertaining to super-asymmetry.
Penny Hofstadter: Wait, what?
Amy Farrah Fowler: A team of physicists confirmed super-asymmetry. Our paper was right. We did it.
Sheldon Cooper: We did it?
Amy Farrah Fowler: We did it.
Sheldon Cooper: We did it.
Amy and Sheldon (screaming): We did it! We did it! We did it!
(Rest of the gang can hear them outside of the appartment)
Penny Hofstadter: Aw, remember when they only did it on her birthday?
Amy Farrah Fowler: Did you even read the article? Because I talk about you continuously.
Sheldon Cooper: I know, and it just made you sound modest and charming.
Amy Farrah Fowler: Why can't you just be proud of me?
Sheldon Cooper: I am proud of you.
Amy Farrah Fowler: Really? Because you sound jealous.
Sheldon Cooper: Well, I'm that, too. I've seen Inside Out. I know I can feel two things at once. (Bernadette shoots them both with a paintball gun...) Well, now I feel three things.
Sheldon Cooper: I've been acting like the game is over, but it's only halftime. And there's a lot more physics left to play.
Amy Farrah Fowler: Wow, was that your first ever sports metaphor?
Sheldon Cooper: It was. And I think it was a home run. That's two.
(Amy and Sheldon are watching old video of young Sheldon)
Amy Farrah Fowler: Oh, look how cute you were.
Sheldon Cooper: Amy please, of course I was cute. Look how I turned out.
Amy Farrah Fowler: It is the emergency pep talk you made when you were a kid.
Sheldon Cooper: Oh, that. I was saving it for the day they stop making Star Wars movies. I don't think that's ever gonna happen.
Amy Farrah Fowler: How long has it been since you've seen it?
Sheldon Cooper: Not since the day I recorded it. No, I had just watched Back to the Future II, where Marty McFly gets a glimpse of his future self and that got me thinking, the day may come where I needed my help, like they did with that movie. That was not great.
Leonard Hofstadter: I have something that might help. It's-it's a recording of the only person whose opinion Sheldon actually respects.
Amy Farrah Fowler: Hawking? Feynman?
Leonard Hofstadter: No, himself. It's a pep talk he made when he was a kid. He gave it to me years ago and told me to save it for a real emergency.
Penny Hofstadter: What? You didn't break it out when he declared his room a sovereign nation and waged a trade war against us?
Leonard Hofstadter: His major export is talking. I didn't want that anyway.
(Penny explains to others what not to say infront of Amy and Sheldon to not make them upset...)
Penny Hofstadter: We should just try and avoid anything that makes them think of their project or science or Nobel Prizes or successes or failures.
(Amy and Sheldon walk in...)
Amy Farrah Fowler: What are you guys doing?
Bernadette Rostenkowski-Wolowitz: Nothing.
Sheldon Cooper: Nothing? Like what my career has come to? Thanks a lot.
(Sheldon storms out of the room)
Howard Wolowitz: Nice going.
Amy Farrah Fowler: What do you guys think you're doing?
Rajesh Koothrappali: We're showing Sheldon "Halloween".
Amy Farrah Fowler: Absolutely not. Sheldon, come home.
Sheldon Cooper: But I really want to watch it.
Amy Farrah Fowler: I know you do, but I am forbidding it.
Sheldon Cooper: Oh, man. Sorry, guys. (Amy and Sheldon leave...) What took you so long?
Amy Farrah Fowler: I'm sorry. I just got your text!
Amy Farrah Fowler: Who's Tam?
Sheldon Cooper: He was my best friend in the whole world growing up.
Amy Farrah Fowler: Really? Why have I never heard you mention him before?
Sheldon Cooper: Oh, of course I have. I'm sure I've mentioned him, like, five times this week.
Amy Farrah Fowler: I don't think you have.
Sheldon Cooper: Tam! Tam! Tam! Tam! Tam! There, it's only Thursday.
Amy Farrah Fowler: I didn't just drink the crazy milk, I bought the crazy cow.
Amy Farrah Fowler: What the hell, Penny?!
Penny Hofstadter: I'm gonna need more than that.
Amy Farrah Fowler: You're not having kids? How could you do this to me?
Penny Hofstadter: How is it any of your business?
Amy Farrah Fowler: Because your kids were supposed to be friends with my kids. Who's gonna be friends with them now?
Penny Hofstadter: They will find other friends.
Amy Farrah Fowler: Oh, sure, 'cause Sheldon's DNA plus my DNA equals a kid who knows how to make friends. Grow up!
Mark Hammil: Amy, do you take Sheldon for your lawful wedded husband?
Amy Farrah Fowler: I do.
Mark Hammil: And, Sheldon, same thing.
Sheldon Cooper: I do.
Mark Hammil: Then by the power vested in me by EvenYouCanPerformWeddings.com... I now pronounce you husband and wife. You may kiss the bride.