Chandler Bing: So I have a flaw. (his flaw = smoking) Big deal. Like Joey’s constant knuckle-cracking isn’t annoying? And Ross, with his over-pronouncing every single word. And Monica, with that snort when she laughs. I mean, what the hell is that thing? I accept all those flaws. Why can’t you accept me for this?
Ross Geller: A thumb? (in her soda can)
All five: Ew.
Phoebe Buffay: I know, I know. I opened it up and there it was… just floating in there, like this tiny little hitchhiker.
Chandler Bing: Maybe it’s a contest, you know’? Like “Collect all five.”
Phoebe Buffay: Hey, Lizzy.
Lizzy (homeless woman): Hey, Weird Girl.
Phoebe Buffay: I brought you alphabet soup.
Lizzy: Did you pick out the vowels?
Phoebe Buffay: Yes, but I left in the Y’s. Because, you know, “Sometimes Y.”
Phoebe Buffay: “Dear Ms. Buffay: Thank you for calling attention to our error. We have credited your account $500. We’re sorry for the inconvenience… and hope you’ll accept this football phone… as our free gift.” Do you believe this? Now I have $1000 and a football phone.
Rachel Green: What bank is this?
Phoebe Buffay: There’s 500 extra dollars in my account!
Chandler Bing: Oh, Satan’s minions at work again.
Joey Tribbiani: Great story! But, I uh, I gotta go, I got a date with Andrea–Angela–Andrea… Oh man…
Chandler Bing: Angela’s the screamer, Andrea has cats.
Joey Tribbiani: Right. Thanks. It’s June. I’m outta here.
Joey Tribbiani: She got the furniture, the stereo, the good TV- what did you get?
Ross Geller: You guys.
Chandler Bing: Oh, God.
Joey Tribbiani: You got screwed.
Ross Geller: I’m supposed to attach a brackety thing to the side things, using a bunch of these little worm guys. I have no brackety thing, I see no whim guys whatsoever and- I cannot feel my legs.
Rachel Green (on the phone with her Dad): Well, maybe I don’t need your money. Wait!! Wait, I said maybe!!
Rachel Green: I just didn’t know where to go, and I know that you and I have kinda drifted apart, but you’re the only person I knew who lived here in the city.
Monica Geller: Who wasn’t invited to the wedding.
Rachel Green: Ooh, I was kinda hoping that wouldn’t be an issue…